Any Other Way
by charmablackhole
Summary: This is set towards the beginning of the series. I'm not sure how correct it actually is as I only started watching Merlin this year. I read about it on the Wiki page and the transformation of Morgana from a good person to evil was something that really interested me. Mordred is in here because he is my favourite character. :P
1. Chapter 1

She was lying on the stone floor of the tower, curled up tightly as if trying to hide herself from the outside world. Next to her was her dragon, his white skin glowing where the few slivers of light in the tower caught it. His eyes were closed like her. Around them, the walls reached high into a pinnacle at the top. There were no doors and no windows. If it wasn't for the few gaps in the stone, Morgana thought she would have already gone insane. Even so, she didn't know how long she could last. The dragon nuzzled closer to her, making soft, sad noises. He couldn't talk to her telepathically anymore. The sorcerer had muted him after they were captured. The sorcerer; that was what confused her the most. A sorcerer had trapped them. The unknown sorcerer didn't ever try to help them.

Morgana hated him.

She liked this hate. It was the only thing that keep her breathing, that stopped her from giving up. She would find this sorcerer, this traitor and then…

It was easier than thinking about Arthur anyway. She didn't know what to think about him and she had had enough time. Why was he allowing this to happen? They were brother and sister. But it seemed he was more loyal to his father, the murderer, than her. What did she expect? She was always the braver one.

The plate of food appeared in front of her, like it did every morning. So it was morning again. She had lost track of hours but she was counting the days by when the food arrived. It was a mental activity, never forgetting. She dreaded the day when the number slipped out of her head.

36.

That was the number of days she had been trapped. More than a month and made far, far longer by the fact that there was nothing. There were only stone walls closing in around her. She wondered how long they were planning to keep her there. Was it a punishment or a lifelong prison?

She had to get free. If her plan had worked she wouldn't have cared what happened afterwards. But it had failed because of the sorcerer. She had to get free and kill Uther.

She was forming a plan. It wasn't much but it kept her occupied. She had been listening to the magic that sent her food here, trying to remember the feel of it so that when she met the sorcerer she would know it was him. But that wasn't the plan. That was simply a revenge for later. No, what she was doing was stealing the magic.

The sorcerer had sealed her and her dragon's magic once they were captured, but he hadn't noticed everything. He hadn't guessed she always, always had a plan B. It was a small bracelet that she had tied tightly half way up her arm, where it wouldn't be revealed if her sleeve fell back. It was simply a leather cord tied around a piece of silver. It was a magic box. When she had been captured she had simply shoved a piece of her magic in there, a tiny piece that no one would notice. Now she was using that magic to attract and hold the magic that brought the food.

He hadn't noticed yet.

Of course, it was still too small an amount to even be a match to the sorcerer – even when she had all her magic he had still defeated her – but it could help her to escape. She was sure that it was the actual building that trapped her magic, like the iron cuffs they put on druids to stop them fighting back. Once she was out she could do anything she wanted.

On day 20 she had tried to move one of the stones. Nothing. She tried again until day 25. It was then that she thought of something else. She thought of someone else who had slipped her mind.

Mordred.

He was out there somewhere otherwise they would have trapped him here with her. Or maybe no one had even suspected him of being involved. He was free. She wasn't.

_Mordred!, _she called with her magic every day. _Mordred, help me!_

Ten days had passed but she didn't give up. He would hear her one day and come and save her and heal her, just as she had done for him. She had no idea where she was and it might take that long for Mordred to reach her. But he would. She had that one trust in the world.

She pulled the plate of food and a beaker of water towards her. She drank a few sips of the water, wetting her lips and then waking her dragon and giving the rest to him. She chewed on the stale bread and passed the piece of raw meat to her dragon. It had surprised her at first that the sorcerer would actually think of feeding a dragon but she supposed he knew dragons were valuable. Not that he would ever, ever get hers.

She closed her eyes and listened. The crash of the sea was constant and the cries of the wind. She was listening because there was nothing else she could but wait. She stayed like for a while. Her dragon got up and started pacing around the room. He whimpered a bit as he walked, his legs stiff and unused. The light was fading in the tower, even the cracks of light slowly disappearing. Somehow she had survived another day. _One day closer to you, Emrys._

43.

She was starting to give up. It was too hard. Mordred wasn't here and she didn't know how long she could wait. She looked at the plate of food and pushed it away. Her dragon wasn't even moving anymore. He just slept and she was starting to see the point of it. To just end it all. It would be a revenge in a way as well. _Arthur, Merlin, Mordred – this is your fault for not saving me, for not caring. _Anger flooded through her in a wave and she pushed at the plate with her magic, sending it back to were it had come from. She used all the magic in her bracelet but she didn't care. _I'm not going to survive. Uther burnt all those Druids on the stake – this is just another execution but out of the public eye. _Her dragon moved closer to her, opening his eyes. And Morgana saw he was crying. She shook her head.

"No, don't.." Then she realised she was crying as well. Crying for her life before the magic came and made it so complicated. Crying because she had never felt so alone in her life, that no one was going to save her. "Why do they hate us so much?" she asked her dragon but he shook shook his head, unable to say anything. She rested her head on his shoulder and slowly they fall asleep.

44.

She didn't want to wake up but the light streaming in hurt her eyes. She ignored the plate of food and water. She would die here. She would rather it was sooner than later.

45.

She didn't open her eyes.

46.

She felt so weak.

47.

_Why?_

After day 47 she lost count. The nights blurred with the days, her eyes only confusing her. Her dragon was never awake now and just kept on breathing slowly. Slower every time Morgana woke up. She didn't cry any more. She didn't have anything left in her to cry about.


	2. Chapter 2

No one would tell him what happened, not even Emrys. He knew that Morgana had done something very bad, something to hurt the king, but not what. More importantly he didn't know where she was.

Mordred walked into Merlin's room, sat down on the bed. He looked around the room carefully. It was a mess as usual but Mordred was looking for something different. Some clue. He stood up again and opened Merlin's cupboard. It was quite empty but it felt strange in a way. He waited for something to happen and then went and closed the door. It felt bad to be sneaking around behind Emrys's back, but Emrys had a secret about Morgana Mordred needed to know.

He took out all the contents of the cupboard out, making sure he didn't mess it up so he could replace it later. Then he reached the thing that felt so strange. It was a plate just like the ones they always ate off. Nothing fancy, just roughly carved wood.

_Then why was it hidden in the cupboard?_

He reached out to pick it up. As soon as his hand touched the wood he heard the voices.

_Mordred! Help me! I'm trapped. Where are you? Mordred, help me. Why aren't you here? Can't you find me? Please come. I can't do anything. I'm trapped. Are you coming?_

Morgana. He snatched his hand away and quickly placed all the things back in the cupboard. He had just closed the cupboard doors when he heard footsteps. He froze, listening. It was Emrys.

The door opened and he walked in.

"Mordred! What are you doing here?"

Mordred shrugged.

"I was looking for you."

"Well.." Merlin said. "What is it?"

_Don't worry. I've found my answer, Emrys._

Merlin watched as Mordred walked calmly out of the room. That Mordred had used telepathy disturbed him slightly. Not that he could do it, but that he had chosen to use it just for that sentence. Merlin looked around the room but nothing seemed to have been touched. He sat down on the bed, leaned back against the wall. He had been cleaning and polishing weapons all morning and then Gaius wanted help with grinding plants and mixing up potions to help some villagers that were sick. He sighed. Mordred had been acting strangely ever since... well, ever since the betrayal. One day Merlin would tell him about it but right now it seemed a bit cruel to tell him Morgana was dangerous and had to be contained. One day...

He tried to sleep but couldn't with thoughts of Morgana running through his head. He still couldn't understand it. Morgana had been a friend – it was the two of them, and then three when they found Mordred. At the beginning he had wanted to blame Morgause, that she was the one that influenced Morgana... But he realised that Morgana did hate Uther and he just didn't notice it soon enough. He just didn't expect her power to grow so very quickly. At least it was sealed now.. except... He got up, remembering the plate. He still couldn't figure out how she had sent it back. He wasn't really sure what to do with it – it almost scared him. He opened the cupboard, shoved everything out of the way and took the plate out. She had been sending messages through it but he hadn't been able to make them out. But as he held it, tonight, her voice was the clearest he had ever heard.

_Goodbye._

He stared. What was she going to do? She couldn't escape, he'd made sure of that. Besides, the tower was an ancient anti-magic place full of wards and lined with iron. He tried to ignore the feeling that was creeping up on him, the feeling that she actually sounded sad. Sad and not really there anymore. But no, that couldn't be. That would be too much like the Morgana who was his friend, not the one that had tried to kill Uther.

He ran downstairs and grabbed a jug of water off the table.

"Merlin? What are you-" Gaius called out but Merlin didn't reply. He slammed his door and poured the water into the shallow dip in the plate. He concentrated and left the magic flow out of him into the plate. The surface of the water slowly grew cloudy and then cleared again to reveal the dark insides of the tower. Morgana and her dragon were lying still on the floor. Merlin watched, waiting, but they didn't move. _It was night-time, wasn't it? Of course they were asleep. _But he put a monitoring spell on it anyway to alert him if anything changed. He placed the plate on the floor and fell asleep.

At dawn, the spell woke him. He jumped up, almost tripping over the plate and saved spilling it just in time. He rubbed his eyes open. Morgana was waking up with the tendrils of light that slipped in through the cracks. Her dragon stayed still, just breathing softly. She slowly turned her face to where the monitoring spell was and Merlin could see her. Her cheeks were tear-stained, her hair in a tangle. But what scared him the most was the lack of life. She opened her eyes and there was nothing there. Just emptiness. And then she closed them again, looking so, so tired.

Merlin had avoided watching her until now. Now he realised why. He was scared of this and the emotions that came with it. It had been more than a month now but it hadn't seemed long at all to him. He was still cleaning up the mess after Morgana was captured and the guards were still jumpy. For Morgana it looked like she had been in there for a lifetime.

It was wrong.

He had agreed with the idea at the time, though of course no one actually cared what he thought, because it had seemed the easiest way. They couldn't exile her because then she would just come back with more trouble. Merlin couldn't let her die yet and while Uther obviously wanted her burnt on the stake, he sensed that his son, Arthur, wouldn't agree with that. So they would imprison her in a safe place where she could do nothing to harm anybody.

But it was still wrong.

He had never felt so helpless. How could he get Uther to grant her more freedom – or maybe exile her somewhere far, far away? Convince her not to come back? But he knew that Uther would never listen to a mere servant and it would take a long time to convince Arthur to actually listen to his advice and pass it on. By then it might be too late. The _'Goodbye_' was ominous. But what else could he do? He couldn't free her himself because that would mean he would purposely could Arthur in danger again. Even if he did it secretly, secrets always came out and he'd probably be executed. He was lost. There was no chance him getting back to sleep now and anyway, he had a lot to do. He considered asking the dragon what to do but decided against it. Kilgarrah would just tell him to leave Morgana there to die.

He went up to Arthur's room, who announced they were going on a hunt today. Merlin sighed and went off to prepare Arthur's armour and horse.

"Merlin? Is something wrong?" Arthur said.

"What? No, I.." Merlin said. "I just had a dream about Morgana," It was a lie, but Merlin wanted to see Arthur's reaction. Besides, he had been thinking about her.

Arthur turned away, scowling.

"Afraid she's going to come back? Don't worry, she's somewhere where she'll never escape. Father made sure of that."

"No," Merlin replied. "I dreamt of her when she was still on our side."

"Oh, just leave it, won't you? She's evil now and there's nothing we can do about it." Arthur stood up and stared out of the window. "She's a witch."

Merlin waited.

"Just leave it." Arthur said. Merlin quietly closed the door behind him. A witch, he thought, and the want to tell his own secret was pushed far, far away. _If you told him, you'd probably be exiled in the best case. Executed in the worst. _He almost felt sorry for Morgana. He could remember how frightened she was at first when she realised she had magic, how she tried so hard to hide it. How she confided in Merlin and he told her nothing back. _Maybe if I had told her..?_ But it wasn't any good regretting what had already past. He would have to keep on working at Arthur, try to get him to lighten Morgana's punishment. Arthur was still angry and confused but he still also remembered to old Morgana. His clever, kind sister. Merlin would mention it again to Arthur later. It was a risk but well, that was his life, wasn't it?


	3. Chapter 3

Merlin was running down the stairs, taking Arthur's armour back to the storage room when Gwen stopped him. She was frowning.

"What's wrong?" Merlin said.

"Merlin, have you seen Mordred?"

"Yeah, he.." Merlin said. "No, actually. I last saw him two days ago." _In my room,_ he added in his head. "I've been busy, you know.."

"But I haven't seen him either."

"He's probably just gone on a walk,"

"For two days?" Gwen raised her eyebrow. "And not come back at nightfall?"

"We've probably just missed him. Anyway, I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to be alone, with all the business about Morgana."

"Did you tell him?"

"'Course not. He's just a kid."

"Really?" Gwen thought of Mordred, the clear blue of his eyes as he watched everyone, the calmness. "I think you should tell him – he deserves that. "

Merlin watched Gwen walked away. He had trying to avoid telling Mordred but Gwen was right. He deserved to know that Morgana had turned evil. He walked over the Gaius's place and asked where Mordred was.

"Mordred? I don't know…" Gaius said. "I haven't seen him for a while actually, but that might just be my old brain going." He chuckled.

Merlin frowned. _Where was Mordred?_

"He's probably out on a walk," Gaius said, echoing Merlin's earlier words.

"Maybe," Merlin replied. "I think I'll go and look."

He left the castle through the small gate. Arthur didn't need to know he was going out – he would just find something else for Merlin to do. Merlin walked softly, trying to sense Mordred's mind. There was nothing, just the soft songs of the evening birds. He started walking faster, further and further away.

"Mordred?!"

No answer.

_Mordred! _He tried again, this time through his mind.

No answer.

_Mordred must be too far away_, Merlin thought. _That's why he's not replying. But where is he then? _He wondered whether Mordred had left because Morgana wasn't there anymore. It would make sense; they were close to each other, especially with them sharing their ability of magic. Once again, Merlin regretted not telling Morgana about his gift. No, there wasn't time for regrets. He had to find Mordred.

He walked through the forest for another few hours but still couldn't find him, so he returned to the castle. It was dark now, the shadows casting Camelot in a grim light. Gaius was already asleep when Merlin got back. Mordred wasn't there. He went to bed but couldn't sleep. One question keep on pulling at him;

_What if Mordred didn't reply because he didn't want to talk?_

Somehow, the idea frightened Merlin more than anything.


	4. Chapter 4

He could see it In the distance now, the tower. He hadn't known it would be a tower but he almost recognized it, in a strange way. It was almost like he was connected to Morgana now. He called out to her telepathically but got no answer. It wasn't a surprise. Her magic must he trapped. He still called out to her because she might be able to hear but not reply. He really hoped she could. It had been far too long. The night taunted him now, telling him it was one more day that he hadn't reached Morgana. He had walked the whole way; he hadn't dared transport because Emrys would detect it. It had been almost a week now and the time made him a bit confident. Maybe Emrys wouldn't notice.

But he didn't want to think about Emrys, not now. Emrys had known and he had said nothing to Mordred. He was… well, strange. He was a sorcerer yet he served the son of the man who hated magic the most in the world. Emrys had watched his kinsmen burn to death on the stake and did nothing against it. Of course, Mordred had watched so many die as well but he was only a child. There wasn't much he could do. Emrys had a lot more magic and power than Mordred – yet he seemed to do nothing with it, except trail around after Arthur. This was the worst though. Capturing Morgana, imprisoning her. Emrys was a traitor to his own people; a traitor to his friends.

He was closer to the tower now and could make it out clearly. It was ten or so metres high, the roof peaking to a point and utterly bare of anything. He circled around it. There were no doors and no windows. No way in. _But there must be! They put Morgana in, so I must be able to get her out, _Mordred thought. He carefully approached the tower.

"Morgana!" he called out softly. She might be able to hear since only magic was blocked.

No answer.

"Morgana!" he shouted this time, wishing, wishing so hard she would reply.

Nothing.

But she was there, Mordred knew. He could _feel_ her.

He reached out his hand to touch the curved stone wall. A static shock of magic fizzed through his fingers, throwing him back. _So it was protected magically as well. _He walked away from the tower, wondering if Emrys had detected him but nothing happened so he closed his eyes and truly looked it the tower. It was set on rock so he couldn't get inside that way. He didn't know of any flying spells so there was no chance of getting through the roof. And – no, there! He had seen something. He stared at the wall, eyes wide open now but there was nothing. He turned his head to one side and there, in the corner of his eye, he could make out a blurry outline.

He had found the door.

It was a clever trick, one that a non-magical person would never notice. The door was clouded behind many, many illusions but Mordred could still just about see it. It was small, so that a grown man would have to stoop to get in it and made of wood. It also had a metal lock. He examined it and was surprised to find that it was actually a normal lock. It was hidden by magic but it only required a key to unlock it. Obviously, the king hadn't wanted the magic to control everything. Mordred probed at the magic now. It was old magic. It wasn't Emrys's magic. That made him happy. Mordred destroyed the feeling immediately. _Then why did he have the plate with Morgana's voice inside it if he wasn't keeping her trapped? _It was still good news, though. Emrys would never realise what was happening – he wasn't connected.

So Mordred started to unweave the magic slowly. He did it slowly because while he could remember Morgana's voice saying _"Help me!" _so urgently, he didn't know whether the magic was actually part of the building and would collapse without it.

Finally, he managed to clear the magic from around the door. He whispered a word in the ancient tongue, and the lock clicked open. He took the lock off and dropped it to the ground then pushed the door open.

Mordred was unable to move.

He saw Morgana lying on the stone wall, draped over her dragon. Her face was gaunt and thin and her hair streaked with dirt. As he looked closer he saw that her usually long nails were bitten to the quick. Her skin was pale, translucent and Mordred could see the veins snaking delicately, so vulnerable, underneath.

"Morgana," he managed to whisper, his throat dry. "I found you."

She didn't move and Mordred was struck by a sudden, horrifying thought.

_What if she was already dead? What if I came too late?_

He ran up to her and felt the pulse in her wrist. She was still in this world, still alive. But from the look of it, she wouldn't be much longer.

"Morgana, wake up!" he said. He ran a hand through his hair, waited. He shook her arm, so scared of hurting her more. "Come on, we need to go now!"

The dragon was waking up instead, and growled weakly at Mordred. Mordred ignored it.

"You wake her up then!"

The dragon snorted at him but he seemed to understand and started licking Morgana's hand. And her hand moved, flicked back at the dragon.

"Yes, come on! You can wake up!"

Mordred waited. The time inched past but then finally, she opened her eyes.

Mordred wished she hadn't.

There was nothing of Morgana left in those eyes. They were blank and empty and Mordred felt a flood of anger slowly infilterate every part of his body. Morgana cringed back into her dragon, her eyes darting wildly. Mordred breathed deeply.

"It's okay. I'm not going to hurt you." he said. "You're safe now. I'll get you out of this place."

She looked at him, opened her mouth.

"Wa-" her voice are cracked and unused. Mordred waited.

"Who-" she managed to slip out. "...are...you?"

Mordred turned his face away.

"A friend. Come on, we need to go now."

Morgana tried to stand up but she fell over again.

"I.. can't.."

Silently, Mordred picked her up in his arms. She was so light, like a bird. Far too light. It scared him. She tried to protest but couldn't. She didn't have the strength left in her. Mordred walked through the door and she flinched as the light hit her. Mordred was about to cover her eyes she stopped him.

"No. I want-"

She was crying. Mordred let her. It was better than seeing no emotion in her eyes. He walked with her until they couldn't see the tower anymore and then he stopped. He would rather get to a safe place on foot but it wasn't a good idea with Morgana so close to death as she was. Besides, he almost hoped that Emrys would notice him transporting, even though Morgana would be in more danger then. He was angry.

Mordred lay Morgana down on the grass and using a stick, drew a circle around them. She was too tired to question what he was doing. He whispered a few words under his breath and the magic started gathering around them, ready to take them far, far away.

And then _he _was there. _He _was stopping them.

Of course _he _had detected it, the portal. Mordred was glad.

"Mordred!"

_Emrys._

"What are you doing? You don't understand-" Merlin shouted as he ran towards them.

_Leave now, Emrys. _As a warning, he shot a beam of magic as Merlin who stopped, seeming to finally understand that Mordred was serious. Merlin raised his hands, like he was calming a wild horse.

"Mordred, Morgana isn't who you think she is anymore. I didn't want to tell you but you have to understand. She-"

"I already know." Mordred said aloud. "Do you take me for a fool?"

"She tried to kill Uther-"

"Which I would gladly do in her place if given the chance,"

Merlin's face grew shuttered.

"You don't understand." he repeated.

Mordred gathered up his magic, wanting to get away. He didn't want to know this Emrys. It was then when he heard a small cry behind him. He spun around and saw Morgana collapsed on the ground. He hadn't even seen Merlin's lips move.

"How dare you-"

"She's only unconscious, don't worry," Merlin replied. "Now step aside, Mordred."

Mordred stared at him.

_Do you know that she's given up? Do you know that she doesn't even know who I am anymore?_

"Mordred, calm down,"

"Do you know that this is all your fault?!" he shouted and sent all the messages Morgana had sent him to Emrys. He watched him stumble backwards, smiled a little. Waited for him to leave. But Emrys walked towards Mordred instead.

"Morgana is dangerous. She can't be free."

"She's your friend!" Mordred shouted. "It was the three of us together, the ones with magic! Oh, except you never told Morgana, did you? You let her suffer and change until she had to realize, like me, that we aren't safe in Camelot while Uther is King! He hates us, and we hate him back." He stopped and then his voice went quiet. "Except you were too much of a coward to even tell your own kin, you were so scared. The great Emrys – scared!" He laughed lightly. "And because you were – are – such a coward, this is what happened." Mordred picked Morgana up. "Look at her. Look at your friend. Look at what you've done to her!" Mordred watched the look of guilt crossing Emrys face.

"It wasn't my choice, Mordred. The King ordered she was locked away."

"Why not just in the dungeons then?"

"It had to be safe, and the Pendragons have used this tower for centuries to trap witches."

_Morgana is not a witch. _

"You know what I mean. Anyway, that's had important. What I'm trying to say is that it is nothing to do with me!"

"Then why didn't she succeed in her mission? I know you and everyone in the castle. You're the only that could have stopped her."

"Arthur-"

"Don't be stupid. She has magic and Arthur doesn't."

"I couldn't just let her kill Uther!"

"Oh, and here's another thing. The plate in your wardrobe. You knew she was imprisoned and no never ever tried to help her escape."

"Mordred, I-"

"You could have easily, you know. I managed it and I'm not half as powerful as you. But you didn't do anything. You let your friend waste away in a tower until she died."

"I was going to talk to Arthur!"

"And that would be too late! Don't you get it, Emrys? She was dying!"

"But I sent her food – she would already be dead if I hadn't. Why would she die?"

Mordred almost pitied Emrys.

_She didn't want to live anymore._

"Uther wanted her burnt on the stake. I-" Merlin stopped. "I thought this would be better."

So close, so very close, Mordred thought.

"But she is still dangerous, and must be contained."

"A friend."

"Don't you get it? She has changed!"

"No, you have and I never noticed it." Mordred said. "You're a true slave to the Pendragons' wishes now."

Merlin was silent, a grim expression on his face.

"Let us go," Mordred said.

"No, I can't."

Merlin whispered a spell, a binding spell to trap both of them. Mordred's eyes flashed golden and pure magic flowed out of him. He sent it at the spell Merlin had made, tearing it to shreds. Then he set the magic on Merlin himself. Merlin buffed it aside.

"We don't have to fight!" he shouted.

_Yes, I do._

Mordred attacked with renewed strength, sending fire, a whirlwind, anything he could think of. Merlin pushed the attacks aside with such ease that it just infuriated Mordred more. _How dare he?! _Merlin didn't even try to fight back properly, only sending trapping spells, not anything that would actually hurt. It was then that Mordred realised he actually had an advantage over the greatest mage the world had ever known. Merlin was still afraid of hurting them but Mordred wanted to hurt him, make him feel the pain Morgana had felt, all alone in the tower.

Then one of Merlin's spell trapped Morgana's dragon. It whimpered, twisting around in it's newly formed cage. Mordred tried to free it but the locks on the cage were far too intricate to undo in a moment. And Merlin would aim for Morgana next. Mordred took one last look at the dragon, knowing Morgana would hate him for this. But Morgana had to come first.

"Goodbye, Aithusa," he whispered to dragon and threw a wall of magic towards Merlin, distrating him. He held Morgana in his arms and together, they transported away.

Merlin was left with the dragon and Mordred last words echoing in his mind.

_I will never forget this, Emrys, and I will never forgive._


End file.
